Mind Mantra

Your best friend calls you and tells you he/she's really sick? How do you show you care?

Just do it! There is something to that saying. Don't over think it. We can live in our heads too much. Over thinking usually begins with thoughts that start with "What if.." These 'what if' thoughts are typically negative and furthermore, they can be even catastrophic. Next thing you know, you have talked yourself out of something good. If you've made a decision to do something- just do it! If you have one of these 'what if' thoughts, make it a positive one.

Do you do a lot of "mind reading?"

 

If you are saying things like "I know what he/she is thinking about me." Or, " She thinks I am ...". These are Cognitive Distortions.  Mind reading is actually listed as a distorted thinking style that contributes to untrue assumptions and poor communication. Truth is that we don't know what any one is thinking. 

You need to check out your assumptions. A classic example of this is when some one you know walks by you, without saying 'Hi.'  You may feel snubbed, or ignored; and judge this at as deliberate. Maybe they didn't even see you. My son asked me "Mom are you mad at me?" He says this because I "look serious." Nothing could be further from the truth. So i explain to him that, I am thinking about something serious, but it has nothing to do with him. At least he asked, and it got cleared up. 

Mind reading is a big part of the Indian Culture, we don't check things out because we are afraid it may lead to confrontation. The opposite is more accurate, that when you check things out, you sort out feelings of hostility and get rid of any tension that may have built up. I can always be reached at 416 566 8252.

Time out for yourself is therapy for the soul

Taking time out for yourself is as important as eating a meal or taking a shower. As women, we are so busy taking care of others- our children, partners, parents or extended family. that we neglect our selves. Take time out every day to nurture yourself. Consider it "soul food."  Take fifteen minutes out of the day to do something for yourself that energizes you. Make it a routine. It could be exercise, reading the paper, a walk in the neighbourhood, listening to music. 

Why is it so hard to do? We even feel guilty about it, or think it is selfish on our part. This is an unhealthy attitude towards taking time out for yourself. Here's a little test you can do. Rate your mood from 1 to 10, 10 is feeling great, and 1 is feeling run down. Rate it before you do this fifteen minute break. Then rate your mood after. If your mood has improved even slightly, you know what you need to do more regularly. What is your "soul food?"

I can be reached at 416 566 8252.