Two years ago, I sold my house in Toronto and bought a beautiful waterfront estate with my husband Steve. It was love at first sight. The house is a sprawling 8000 sq. ft with an open plan kitchen that makes entertaining a delight! The four guest bedrooms, a games room, a movie theatre, a fully equipped gym and our own private beach, outdoor hot tub and access to the lake were just some of the many luxuries available to us.
Steve and I were married in our home and it was a beautiful ceremony with our closest friends and family in attendance. It was at this house that I also celebrated my 40th birthday with over 200 guests in attendance. My daughter Imaan hosted her friends here for her 13th birthday.
Over the years, we have entertained many friends at our home and yet we never really felt completely at home in this mansion of a house.
According to my daughter Imaan, it's because the house is simply too big for just three people (and two dogs). On the weeks when Imaan is not with us, Steve and I are pretty much rattling in the space. There's also the issue of Imaan's school which is in Toronto! Yup, for two years, we've been driving from Burlington to Toronto and back everyday during the weeks that Imaan is with us (which is every other week). Imaan has never complained but I am sure she misses out on many sleepovers, study sessions and before or after school activities on account of the commute to and from Burlington.
According to my friends, it's because the house is simply too far! We no longer have spontaneous dinners or have friends that "drop-in" because they are in the neighbourhood.
According to my clients, it's kept me away from so many events that I would have otherwise attended had I lived in Toronto.
If you ask me and Steve, it's all that and then something else. A few months ago, I attended a seminar by David Suzuki where he talks about our obsession with "stuff". We're spending more on consuming more. The more walls we have, the more art I want to purchase. The more closets I have, the more I want to fill them with clothes and shoes and ..well,stuff!
Do we really need a house with 5 bedrooms and 11 televisions? no! Do I really need all the stuff I keep packing into my closets? no! What I would rather have are amazing experiences - with my family and friends and, sometimes, on my own!
At a time when most of my friends are having babies and growing into their homes, Steve and I are soon going to be "empty-nesters" when Imaan leaves for university in three years.
Besides, I really really miss Toronto. My favourite patios are still in Toronto. My doctor, my dentist, my hairdresser - they're all in Toronto. My friends are all in Toronto or the GTA and so, in effect, despite the big house and my desire to entertain, I find I am still in Toronto 2-3 times a week.
So, we've decided to come back to Toronto! Yup, our gorgeous house is officially "on the market". You can check out the virtual tour here. I am sure, it will make a beautiful home to someone..it's just not for me.
We're not likely to buy another house in Toronto. But a LOFT...with high ceilings, a modern finish and arrangement, lots of open space...now THAT would be something. If you see one on the market in the Bloor West Village, Kingsway, Etobicoke (yup, my old hood!) that you think I might like, send along some links!
After all, you can take a girl out of Toronto but you just cannot take Toronto out of the girl ;)
Really well put Syerah! Great perspective on the dilemma so many immigrants/South Asians face. We've lived in the heart of Toronto since we came in 1999 and in this house since 2000. We've dreamed of those bigger homes but nothing ever comes close to the convenience. A few stops to downtown TO for Lynn on the TTC, Allen Rd-401-Yonge St = 8 km = 10 mins drive for me to work. And there have been millions of instance that I have been able to dash back to the boys school for emergencies, etc and then get back to work as well.
Good Luck with the home search - have a great summer.
Kevin
--you write really well!
Posted by: Kevin Lobo | July 08, 2011 at 08:02 AM
It's a wake up call for all empty nesters and collectors (of junk).We were in the same boat two years ago. Something clicked when kids left,we qickly changed to a small house with a lovely garden , very close to town. We are near our friends,family, children and town and enjoying every moment of it.
Posted by: Dolly Bains | July 13, 2011 at 12:17 PM
Hi Syerah,
What a beautiful home, you are right when you say "it will make a beautiful home to someone..it's just not for me". I agree life is too short and it's kind of pointless having a home with no one to share with. I live in Richmond Hill and considered moving many times, but realized that family and friends are what fulfills our lives and moving elsewhere for a better deal just isn't worth it. I am with Royal Lepage if you are interested I would be happy to show you some "lofts" that fit your lifestyle.
Bev Patel
Posted by: Bev Patel | July 14, 2011 at 08:53 AM